How Parents Cope with ADHD Children
What is it like being a parent of a child with ADHD or similar learning difficulties? If you are reading this then you probably already know but this interesting paper What Do Parents of Children with Learning Disabilities, ADHD, and Related Disorders Deal With? looka at the issue from an academic angle. It covers the problems in identifying learning difficulties, the emotional cost for parents in facing the fact their child has problems, the ongoing day-to-day stresses and presents possible strategies for parenting.
It is often confusing to parent children with learning disabilities, ADHD, and related disorders. One of the biggest confusions and challenges parents face is the large hiatus between what the children can do and what they cannot do. Often they are very smart, know a great deal, and reason well, yet cannot read or write. School teachers and family may be telling them to try harder, and they are usually trying their hearts out. They tend to work 10 times harder than everyone else does, but still they may be called lazy.
Another aspect of the confusion for parents lies in how hard it can be to distinguish between a child who can’t do something and a child who won’t do something. For parents, it can be vexing not to be able to control a 5 or 6-year-old or to know whether to push an adolescent or reduce expectations. In this confusion, parents tend to ask, What is wrong with me? rather than What challenges is my child having to face?[emphasis added] Shifting this focus can be therapeutic for parents and children
See also: Parenting and ADHD
Find Out More:
Books:
- The Well Balanced Child: Movement And Early Learning (Early Years)
- Taking Charge of ADHD: The Complete, Authoritative Guide for Parents (Revised Edition)
- Making the System Work for Your Child with ADHD (Making the System Work for Your Child)
- Learning Disabilities:: How to Recognize and Manage Learning and Behavioral Problems in Children
- Ritalin-Free Kids: Safe and Effective Homeopathic Medicine for ADHD and Other Behavioral and Learning Problems
November 19th, 2005
ADD / ADHD, Autism, Dyslexia, Dyspraxia, Dyscalculia
Comments on: How Parents Cope with ADHD Children
My 7 year old son has just been diagnosed with ADHD. I have been advoiding meds until now, can someone please help me ease my mind. I really don’t want a veggie for a child.
Posted by: Tabitha Williams August 9th, 2006 at 6:16 pm
The decision to use or not use ADHD medication is a difficult one.
Have you tried alternative treatments based on exercises and coordination training such as Dore Achievement Centres or Learning Breakthrough.
Have a look at the book Stopping ADHD, its worth a look.
Chris
Posted by: Chris Tregenza August 10th, 2006 at 9:34 am
My 6yr old is diagnosed with ADHD and ODD.He is on ritalin.. days are great, couldnt ask for a nicer kid.. most of the time.. evenings are a nightmare, meds wear off by 7pm and he stays up till 11-12pm.. and 4 out of 5 nights is like a tazmanian devil on steroids..he is very destructive.. is this normal or do I change meds again? ..
Posted by: Joanne April 11th, 2007 at 5:10 am
Look into the books by Dr. David B. Stein. He has a porgram that doesn’t use medications called the Caregivers’ Skills Program. We used it with great success for our sons. Check out his website, http://www.drdavestein.com There is more info about his books, plus he answers questions from parents and gives them help in his members area.
Sarah
Posted by: Sarah June 12th, 2007 at 4:52 pm
My 3 year old son has been diagnosed with ADHD and medication has been recommended. He has been admitted into a specialized program for special education but he is so smart. I haven’t much money and wondering about homeopathic remedies like hylands for this disorder instead of chemical medication.
Any recomendations or ideas?
Posted by: Caryn August 31st, 2007 at 12:52 am
I have an 8 year old son with adhd. I can’t accept having him on meds, however I can’t accept having him fail in school if he’s not medicated.There’s no easy answer or perhaps you may know something that I don’t.
DESPERATE FOR ADVICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Nancy February 1st, 2008 at 9:42 pm
I know exactly how you feel. I’ve dealt with this for 2 years now and have given into the “so called” medication cure. My daughter is still struggling….I don’t know what else to do either.
Posted by: Ashley February 4th, 2008 at 4:03 am
How do you get doctos to listen to you when they tell you that you are a bad parent, How do you get your five year old to dress himself and eat breakfast in time for school, and how do you deal with the teachers constantly telling you that he has had a bad day AGAIN, every day without getting down, oh an how do you deal with husbands who think the only way to get through tho him is shouting???
tired and upset!;-(
Posted by: Justine February 5th, 2008 at 7:05 pm
I have a first grader (daughter) that has been diagnosed with ADD (severe). She has been showing signs since preschool. We gave her Ritalin, it worked like a dream. However my anxiety over medicating my daughter was overwhelming. We took her off and we are trying different alternatives. There must be some other way. Also, I was a child with ADD. I struggled through my childhood without the meds, but by the time I got to college I had grown out of it.
Posted by: Brenda March 13th, 2008 at 3:07 pm
I have a six year old son and I recently found out he have adhd.i tried him on the meds but took him off because i was frightened.i can,t cope with this. what can i do
Posted by: katrina April 14th, 2008 at 7:00 pm
I have been struggling with my 10 yr old since he was 2 and was told he could not paste his pictures together in daycare. I didn’t really pay attention to the problem until 1st grade when I was told he didn’t do anything all day except daydream and play with his school supplies. When tested for learning disabilities, I found out he was very bright and intelligent. I don’t worry anymore except it is something he and I will have to struggle with. i was also ADHD as a child and have struggled with it ever since but that’s just life. I hope that this doesn’t discourage anybody but I really couldn’t stand seeing my son turn into a zombie everytime he was on meds. His personality was beautiful without them and it made me sad to think I was doing this so that I could have a “real” family. This is my son and I love him. I know all of you are going through a tough time but just keep loving your babies and make sure they know that. Make sure though, that his ADHD diagnosis is not a mask for another disorder. But good luck. I will pray for all of you.
Posted by: Monica May 6th, 2008 at 10:29 pm
i have a 7 year old daughter who was diagnosed with adhd in first grade. i have taken her to the doctor and they put her on concerta 54mg witch i give to her befor she goes to school it wa working fine for about 5 months then all of the suden it stoped,called the doctor.the doctor then put her on another medacation that she is to take every evening (strattera 10mg.). she has been on this for about 2 weeks now and takes clonidine 0.1mg at night to go to sleep. None of these medications are working.since they put her on the strattera she has been chewing her fingers raw in school. i am so tired of getting calls,letters from her teacher saying that she has had a bad day and her comming home from school crying because the other kids make fun of her. now my 8 year old wishs that she was never born and wants to stop going to school. i cry my self to sleep every night because i cant do anything for her. from the time that she gets hom the med ware off and it’s like world war 3 in my house. i have to fight herr to do homework, she tearsr my house apart and still has tanturms. please somone post something back and let me know what to do and let me know that i am not alone on this matter. trying to hold strong
Posted by: monica May 21st, 2008 at 3:15 am
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